I've been struggling a little with visualising the in-betweens and transitions so I jumped in Maya and put together a rough pre viz:
I think it's starting to work well. It's a little jerky and I think my timing could do with a little work, but I don't think it's too far off. Let me know what you think, any advice is much appreciated! :D
This has a lot of charm Molly you should be pleased I like the conflict of the character and the black shapes and it's simplicity works well
ReplyDeleteGreat Molly! :)
Thanks Adam! I'm glad you approve :P
Deleteapologies, Molly - I've owed you some feedback for a few days now - sorry! I think you need to think about a '3 act' structure format, because right now you've got an essentially 'flat' tone - a series of scenarios which are no more - or less - crushing or oppressive than the last scenario. It doesn't feel yet that he is losing the battle (before he can win it). So maybe something like:
ReplyDeleteAct 1 - we start in a 'white world' which is invaded by the black
Act 2 - our character struggles to 'push back' the dark, but the dark gets more and more disproportionate.
Act 3 - our character turns the tide and gets things back in proportion.
The '3 act structure' needn't be super rigid, but I think you need to create some additional tension and some pace and some 'conflict'.
Thanks Phil! Don't worry, it was just crit week after all and I've been busying myself with dissertation stuff :P
DeleteYeah I did notice that it felt a bit flat. I think the transitions seem to be working but I'll definitely have another go at it with the new 3 act structure you've recommended :D